I love to travel.

I use to travel a lot. I mean A LOT.

My destination of choice for a long time was Cozumel. I made a great many good friends there. The scuba diving was fabulous. The Corona.. mmmm.. mmm good. Dancing… getting a little wild…..it was all fabulous!

The first time I went to Cozumel, I went with my sister Bridget and my cousin Tiffany.

I’ve never in my life had more fun on a vacation than I did with Bridget and Tiffany. It was one crazy fiasco after another including a bar time search for medical assistance after Bridget, chasing a cute Mexican bar tender, slipped and cracked her head on a table.. gashing it wide open….. major concussion!! I remember sitting next her her.. drunk.. asking her who the president was.. just to see if she was loopy… aside from being drunk. I remember saying, “We need to get your stupid ass to a doctor.” .. which of course we did. WHAT A JOKE! 2am trying to find a medical clinic in Cozumel that’s open. She laughed her drunk, injured head off the whole way to the doctor. You’ll be glad to know the injury didn’t stop her. Her attitude?…..  nothing a cerveza couldn’t cure!!! She got stitched up and we continued to dance, drink and enjoy the ocean. (I advised her against it. There’s no telling Bridget anything.)

Tiffany made friends with William. A Mexican guy with one wandering eye. We teased her relentlessly about it. William was our side kick. He was as sweet as can be, but we never quite knew where to look when he was talking to us. We adored him, wandering eye and all.

Then there was the Bimbo truck. We were riding in a taxi and notice a truck with the word BIMBO in bold red letters was following us. We all started busting out laughing. We’d had a few beers so that probably made the hilarity of the situation more extreme, but Bimbo is the Mexican equivalent to a Wonder Bread.. something about being followed by the Bimbo truck just had us rolling. In our buzzed state we imaged the Bimbo truck was after us… going to take us to some bimbo jail or something. We still joke about it.

Anyway, one night.. at band camp.. I mean in Cozumel… we were at Carlos & Charlies.. dancing of course.. on a table top. That’s what everyone did.. it was wall to wall craziness. The place was packed. Bridget was dancing and drinking a Corona and some totally wasted chick bumped into her beer bottle just as it hit her lips.. and there goes a piece of Bridgee’s front tooth. I can’t tell you how funny it was to see her partially toothless for the rest of the trip. She teases me unmercifully.. so the satisfaction of watching her get dressed up and get her make up on her partially toothless face was PRICELESS. I couldn’t look at her without busting out in laughter.

Anyway.. so the title of this blog post is Por Que?… so let me get to that. I get side tracked. That’s just me. Hang tight.

So, it’s our last night in Cozumel. We’re hanging with wandering eye William and some of his buddies. Being a tall blonde.. I was getting quite a bit of attention, which I’m not going to lie.. I LOVED. You can never get sick of hearing Mamacita ;) LOL (I’m being sarcastic).. anyway… Carlos and Charlies closes and we weren’t ready to call it a night, so wandering eye William gets a case of beer and we go down by the ocean. Tiffany was all sad that she was going to be ending her vacation romance. Bridget was getting cozy with Mariano. I was walking the beach and sipping a beer. I hear Bridget laughing and screaming my name, so I run up by her.  Honestly, I didn’t know what Mariano saw in her.. gashed head and chipped tooth.. but whatever ;)   At this point. I didn’t speak much spanish (I do now, but didn’t then.) Mariano was trying to make the moves on Bridget and she had no idea what he was saying. She must have thought I could translate. Kind of like the blind leading the blind.. but I’d give it my best shot. We were all drunk silly by this point. Us three girls never stopped laughing (or drinking) the entire trip. Anyway, Mariano kept trying to kiss Bridget and she’d pull away and say no.. then he’d say “Por Que? ” Which of course means, Why? in Spanish. In Bridget’s mind she was hearing Parkay.. as in margarine. So every time poor Mariano would say, “Por Que?” as she refused to kiss him, Bridget would say, “Butter” and then laugh hysterically. Then he would say, “Why?” in English trying to explain to her that por que? means … why?….  and she would say, “Because Parkay is butter”.. so they spend about 30 minutes going round and round and every time someone would say, “Por que?” Bridget would scream “BUTTER”… Maybe you had to be there.. but it was fricken hilarious. Kind of like who’s on first. We couldn’t stop laughing. We ended up staying down by the ocean so long that we missed out on taxi service .. so we walked our drunk asses .. beer in hand.. a good 4 miles back to our resort…. laughing the whole way… saying.. “Por Que?”… “BUTTER!!” and hoping the Bimbo truck would come by and give us a lift.

Everybody should have a trip like that. A crazy … drunk.. dance your ass off… trip!

Por Que? … because life’s too damn short to always live by the rules (and when you’re in another country, there’s a good chance your craziness will stay there unless you decide to blog about it.)